National Convention of Blue Bags

Blue the blue bag and Bluer at the National Convention of Blue Bags

So the National Convention of Blue bags went off with a bang last week. Actually it was more like an explosion, when one clever know-it-all filled himself with air. You could just tell that everyone there wanted to do what Bluer did; it was just lucky that he happened to be carrying a pin around with him. The security bags were not impressed, particularly as we had all been scanned on our way in; they just couldn’t acknowledge that their equipment had simply failed to pick up the pin. In the end, they made us all leave the convention and come back in to retest the equipment. Needless to say they didn’t pick up any hazardous weapons, explosives, or flammable liquids second time round either. I could have told them they wouldn’t; you only have to look at us to see that the majority of blue bags are decent law abiding bags. And I don’t mean that in the naive sense; you really do only have to look at us, as most of us are, to a greater or lesser extent, transparent. Luckily they let Bluer off, no doubt helped by my vote of confidence in him. Apparently he hadn’t noticed he had the pin until Azure had started to blow himself up. As he moved out of Azure’s way, he felt a tiny pin prick and realised that one of the pins from the sewing kit he had been carrying, must have fallen out. It could have happened to any bag.

But why you ask,did security care about what I had to say? Well, believe it or not, I have become a well known face in blue bag circles. My opinions and beliefs are now well respected and I was approached by no end of blue bags who told me I had inspired them to search for something better in life. I felt truly honoured, especially when I was mentioned in the keynote speech by Veteran Blue (incidentally, the bag I named myself after). A true pioneer amongst bags,Veteran Blue started life in a greengrocers and since then has been campaigning for universal use of blue bags in all retail outlets.  With so many unemployed blue bags,it is a difficult time to be entering the jobs market. So many purchases are being made online these days, thus reducing the need for conventional bags.

Unfortunately I didn’t get many good pictures of the convention as no cameras were allowed inside. I was told this was to minimise the press photography. Luckily I haven’t seen anything in the news about Bluer’s pin incident, so we seem to have escaped any scandal. But I did manage to get a picture with Bluer as we left the convention. I hope to see more of him in the future, he seems like my kind of bag.

Furthermore, as you have probably noticed, I have taken my plasters off. The National Convention gave me the courage to face the world as I am! And actually I don't think I look that bad!